Just Popping In

Back when deployment started I vowed to show up to my little space on the internet more often, stating how I would fill up all my free time with it to keep my mind off Bren being gone. Well here we are well over halfway there and I haven't showed up once. Hah! Turns out all that free time I thought I'd have disappeared, and trust me I too am wondering where it went. It disappeared somewhere between working two jobs, buying an entire house of furniture, planning a cross country move, arranging the lease the apartment, and planning the wedding. Y'all my life is crazy!
 

I'd love to sit right here, right now, and tell you that it is all going perfect. I am not stressed out at all. I wish I could say that Brendon and I haven't had a single argument and that I haven't gone completely off the deep end more than once. I don't wish we could start over, but I wish two month ago me knew how to handle it all better. First time going through this and hind sight is 20/20, so growing, learning, and making changes every day.
 

Slowly but surely every day the details are falling into place. I never knew how difficult it would be to decorate a house. I used to think it would be fun. As of now I have decided that if I were to win the lottery I would pay someone every last dime of it to decorate our house for me. Holy stressed out. I'm mildly OCD and a perfectionist, put aside the fact that my fiancé has been in no mans land middle east for the last 7 months and I intend for him to come home to a beautiful home to sit down in, sleep in, and relax in. I think I've set this high expectation for myself of what our home will look like, smell like, feel like when he first steps into it and I will work 24/7 to ensure that happens for him. So really, no pressure at all.
 

I will say that i'm hopeful in Cali to establish a good routine for the first few months i'm there before I begin working. I plan to get out of bed when Brendon does for work or if he's on leave between 730-830a. I want to sit down on the sofa with my coffee, have a little quiet time/wake up time, catch up on the news and blogging, and then hit the gym downstairs by 930-10a. I currently am used to waking up early and I quite enjoy it, so I think maintaining that routine will help me greatly to feel a sense of normalcy when I am greatly craving it.
 

I'll stop the rambling with another promise that I shall return soon and hopefully with more consistency. Most likely not until October though! Enjoy the rest of Summer lovelies.